Anger is Keeping You Stuck in Unhealthy Eating Behaviors

Eating disorders and negative patterns with food begin with personal pain (that can look like a lot of different things for people) and set up a vicious cycle of anger: destructive behavior, shame, depression, self-hate, and back to anger.  This anger is taken out on the self, as well as anyone that tries to take away or change the negative patterns with food the person may have. No matter what your food patterns, the misuse of food starts as a natural response of anger to pain. The longer the individual holds on to anger and the longer people respond to the individual with the negative patterns the longer the struggle tends to continue. 

For those that are conflict avoidant this faces a difficult challenge because they often cannot even identify that they are in fact angry. Breaking the cycle and finding the strength to disconnect from an unhealthy relationship with food requires relearning not only the proper response to food, but also the proper response to anger. Often society has taught us that anger is "bad", however it is as natural part of life and our emotions.

Recovery from an eating disorder can only be realized once you dig into the true origin of that anger. To free yourself from the control that anger is imposing on your choices, its recommended that re-experiencing your anger in its fullness,  is often the only way to let it go, and move on. 

Are you or your teen struggling with anger, shame, a disconnect with your feelings, it may be time to connect in order to begin the process of recovery. 

What is Health at Every Size (HAES)?

There are a lot of buzz around Health at Every Size so I decided to do a post specifically telling you all the facts about what it actually means. The good thing about this concept is that its a mindset, not a plan, not something you have to pay for to learn about, and finally not a diet plan.

So without further ado here is what HAES means:

• The weight-neutral approach

• The truth about intentional weight loss

• The cost of sustaining intentional weight loss

• Set-point weight theory, the famine response, and breaking down weight science

• The history of HAES and the non-diet approach

• Fat activism and the fat acceptance movement

• How HAES incorporates intuitive eating, joyful movement, and self-care

• The importance of size diversity in the HAES movement and embracing the genetic determination of body size

• The caveat of HAES with eating disorder recovery and weight restoration

5 Positive, Uplifting, and Natural Tips to Boost Happiness

Spend time with those you love

• This is an easy way to get endorphins streaming throughout your brain, because when you feel connection, you feel peace, joy, and safe
• The time you have to do this of course may vary for each individual, but making an effort to spend time with someone for even a short time will help

Spending time alone doing something that is a passion

• I know this goes against the first tip, yet honestly it can be just as important to recharge your batteries and happiness mojo if you practice hobbies/passions that are yours
• Taking time to reflect and sort out your thoughts will decrease your drive to perform around others and allow to connect with your inner life

Spend some extra time to sleep

• Research suggests that a huge mental cost occurs when you don't getting enough sleep
• In addition research also suggests that those that sleep less tend to have experience more repetitive negative thoughts

Eating a balanced diet

• There is science around eating certain foods and having that lead to a "happiness" neurotransmitters: Eating foods that are high in protein and specifically have a higher percentage of tryptophan (like turkey, sunflower seeds and pumpkin seeds), will provide much needed tryptophan, the precursor to serotonin. Serotonin is the neurotransmitters that medications such as Prozac is attempting to rebalance in the brain. 
• Having a healthy gut, can provide relief as well, so if you experience GI issues, consult a doctor/nutritionist to see if changes in your diet are necessary

Spend time outside

• Early morning sunlight is more intense and this can boost your body’s production of melatonin in the evening. Serotonin converts to melatonin for a great night’s sleep.
• Getting outside for a 20-minute walk in the early morning sunlight can boost your mood and improve your sleep!
• Plus fresh air, and exercise can promote endorphins in the brain as well

Group Therapy Offerings

Here is a shameless plug for my services. Connect with me today if you're interested in having you or your teen join a group. 

7 Ways to Feel More Secure

First off what does it mean to feel insecure? Sure we've all heard that word before, but often I think words get misused and that people have different ways of explaining feeling words, so here is how I define insecure: Feeling fear or anxiety about not being good enough, or that you’re not going to get what you want, or that you will be abandoned, this may cause a racing mind and heart, sweating, feelings of uncertainty or dread. 

Now with that understanding here are 7 ways to feel more secure:

1. Feel your feelings. People try to push insecurities down or to forget them or ignore them. However, there is tremendous opportunity to grow from them, by feeling the uncomfortable feelings and processing them you can deal with them head on, and grow from them. Test out just how real the fears are or if you are simply holding yourself back.

2. Keep a gratitude journal. Insecurities have less power when people understand both their strengths and weaknesses work together to make them unique. Keep a long of what your strengths are, what you feel adds to your life, and what you are grateful for. 

3. Stop comparing yourself to others. From a distance, other people might seem happier, more successful, thinner or wealthier. But often, that is just how it looks. You never truly know what someone else is going through unless they open their whole life to you, its like the old saying "don't judge a book by its cover", what people put out their is typically just a representative of what their real life is.

4. Live in the now. Insecurities often arise when people live in the future or the past. They worry that new things won't turn out positive or that the past will repeat itself. What if you just simply focused on right now, in this moment and lived life as though all you had was this moment?

5. Share your feelings. Often times when we feel insecure we keep it to ourselves, this can very easily keep us stuck. By sharing our emotions with a trusted person we can get the release of letting some of the emotion go, support from someone else, and possibly and objective look on the situation. 

6. Practice doing what you know. If we build on our strengths they can often translate to helping us fight our insecurities. For example if you are really fantastic at fixing things around the house, then practice that, feeling the strength and accomplishment from performing that task, all of those feelings can thing get stored in your mental strength tool box. Then when it comes to the time to give a public speech, all the strength you built up in your mental tool box can get used in to fuel you through what scares you.

7.  Avoid people that make you feel small. You have to protect yourself. That should be your first priority, you are the first priority to you. If you surround yourself with people that empower, encourage and inspire you, then your life will feel more full, safe, and secure.