Being a Helper

Bringing people together, holding space for someone else pain, or even patting someone on the back, can change someone's day, and fulfill a passion.  

My passion in life is being the best person I can be. To be the women my mom has raised, I love to help people out of there problems by guiding them with my advice. Doing so makes me feel good inside; knowing that I can help someone through their problems they are going through. To give them advice I would take myself, if I were in their position. Everyone has a passion in life, if it’s to become a successful man or women in their carrier or to be a stay at home parent for their family that they chose to have. Mine is to help other people, always making sure that person has someone to talk to, someone to see their point of view. I love when my sister comes to me with her problems because I love the feeling of knowing what I’m saying or doing is helping her to be in a better state of mind. To help her through whatever is bothering her, or even if it’s as simple as her having a bad day. I will be there for her no matter how small the problem may or may not be. Because seeing her happy and knowing she is okay is all the satisfaction I need in life. My passion is to make the people around me feel like they’re not alone in feeling the way they feel, that it’s not unusual to feel like the world is crashing down right in front of you. People have their bad days it’s not uncommon, the way I see a brightness come back to someone’s eyes that their day has just gotten better is what I live for, it’s what I love. And I will continue to have this passion throughout my life time, because this passion to me is the best passion anyone could ever have in my eyes. Family means everything.

Granting Grace and Peace

Today I had a moment in which I was reminded about how many people go without the help they deserve. 

I was at a local market siting outside doing some paperwork for my job and overheard a conversation from three individuals. They occasionally turned to me to ask me questions about myself and seemed to have bright spirits. 

As I sat there doing my work, I overheard their conversation about their lives. There was two young women (25-28 years old), one white another black, and an older (45-50 years old) black male. They were sitting around a table discussing what everyone does, their current life. The one girl spoke of how she was trying to get money to get home because her boyfriend had left her at the market, had recently used all of their money to buy illicit drugs, which led to their eviction and homelessness. She appeared quite annoyed with his behavior, which led her to want to engage in wanting to use her food stamp money to buy food then return it for cash so she can buy her own illicit drugs. The other girl had cuts on her arm, and spoke about the cuts as though she had self inflicted them, her leg was also in a brace that she said was because of a “fall”. The older man was telling the girls about how his old lady was going to kick him out, and how he got caught up in a drug deal happening at a local strip club. They finished the conversation by all sharing a beer.

A few thoughts ran through my mind at this moment, as I was both minding my own work, and being invited to join in their conversation from time to time. 

1. They all looked like they needed a hug, some acceptance and love

2. I wonder if things could change for them if they sought help

3. What barriers are they facing that they are in this current state

4. Perhaps they don’t want to change

5. I could offer guidance and suggestions where they could seek help, but who am I to speak to them as though I know something they don’t 

6. Everyone can be subjected to these situations

7. Why was I witnessing this moment, what’s the purpose of me observing this moment

8. How can I look to my higher power for insight and growth after and during this moment

9. I want to wish them all well (so I did)

10. Do I think I am better then them, because I was blessed with a different life? 

In these moment reflection I feel is very valuable and if I could change anything about their lives in this moment, I want to grant them Grace and Peace. We don’t have control of everything, and I do have control with how I handle myself, and any acceptance of a situation is a step that I believe is in the right direction. 

Why I find Creative Writing Mentally and Emotionally Fulfilling

There are many ways to get from A to B, so here is another entry from someone that seeks to find passion and fulfillment. 

There are multiple facets to why I find creative writing mentally and emotionally fulfilling. Over the years that I have written short stories and my novel, I have turned over my motivations inside my head, and like a crystal held to the sunlight, I have learned much about creative writing and myself by carefully examining each individual facet for all their flaws and beauties. 

Among my motivations, perhaps the simplest to understand is my creative expression and the exploration of the imagination. Each time I write, I plunge deep within my own mind and discover buried reservoirs of ideas. Now tapped, these ideas bubble up to the surface eager to see the light of day, and each time I express these ideas, I feel relief at the release. This exploration of my imagination and the expressing myself fills me with a great sense of personal satisfaction, which increases when I am able to share my writings with friends, family, and anyone else willing to read and listen.

Writing for an audience can be emotionally fulfilling in its own right. While I believe that writing is, first and foremost, an act to nurture oneself to learn and develop as a person, writing for other people can be a prime motivator to continue writing even when you've run out of steam. Perhaps it is arrogant to think so, but I enjoy writing to a wide audience with the hope that they will benefit from my stories. Whether great or small, words have the potential to influence and change people for the better, if they are willing to change. Whenever I write stories, I write stories that I personally find entertaining, engaging, and meaningful, and while I do not write stories to create high art or great literature, I do hope other people might find something of value from my work. 

Of course, my stories wouldn't even exist if I knew nothing about people, the world, and myself. When I wrote my first stories, they were short and simple things, often based directly from my real life experiences, which as a pre-adolescent were few. As I grew older and learned more, however, my stories grew in depth and complexity. I found that to avoid dry, repetitive, and trite stories, I needed to ever increase my knowledge about writing, the world, and people. This challenges me mentally, and while creative and critical research aren't conventionally entertaining, they can broaden one's knowledge and their worldview. You never know, you might just find a new favorite interest or hobby out of it as well.  

In fact, I have recently discovered a new interest from creative writing: self-therapy. While not conventionally therapeutic, creative writing helps me cope with my personal problems by encouraging introspection into a wide variety of topics. When I brainstorm my stories, I am regularly required to examine my beliefs, morals, and ideals as to why I think certain story elements are of worthy merit to write about. For example, I might ponder why I value self-sacrifice enough to include it as an important plot point or theme in a story, and whether self-sacrifice is an action I should promote or critique in a story. This would also encourage me to look for second and third opinions on such a topic. Depending on my conclusions, I can learn more about my values, why I believe them, and what they mean to me rather than simply taking them at face value. 

    These facets are the main reasons that I find creative writing fulfilling. I do not presume that every writer and artist feels the same; I am sure there are quite a number of people who create for entirely different reasons and who find creative writing mentally and emotionally fulfilling in other ways. Even the reader may find their own unique reason why creative writing fulfills them, and if so, great! That simply fills the world and its people with greater diversity, and if so, then I strongly encourage everyone to write their own stories, if only a sentence and a word at a time. 

The Power of Intention

Do you know what your intentions are when you set out for your day each morning? Do you know how your day is going to go before you step out your front door?
For the first question, I’d challenge you to sit and think about what you want, what you value, and how you feel about where your intentions lay.
The second question was asked to help us recognize that many of us think or assume we know, but in reality we don’t. So what do you know about your day? What you do know, are your intentions, your perceptions of the past, and how you feel in this moment. Going forward in your day with the assumption its going to be a “hard” or “long” day, becomes your current reality, because you begin to believe it and your perceptions becomes your reality. Weaving DBT into your day helps us realize doing whats effective or doing whats one-mindfully will assist in becoming conscious of where you are, what you are, and why you are. Do so with intention, in and of themselves, our words are but symbols that represent our intentions, so create an inner dialogue that is align with how you want your life to be.

Practice this mindfulness technique:
Become an impartial observer of your own thoughts and words spoken to others, and be keenly aware of what the intention is behind the words you say. If you find yourself saying one thing while thinking or feeling another thing, stop and restate it in an affirming, positive or motivating way.