Have you ever noticed how one moment you feel confident and ready to take on the world, and the next moment another voice in your head shows up with doubts, criticism, or even fear? Maybe there’s a part of you that longs to rest and relax, but another part insists you keep pushing through. Or perhaps there’s a playful, lighthearted side of you that gets shut down by a more serious, responsible voice.

If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. In fact, this is exactly what the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model is built around the understanding that we are made up of many different “parts,” and that this is completely normal. You are not broken or “too much.” You’re human.

What Are “Parts,” Anyway?

In IFS, “parts” are simply the different sides of ourselves that show up in different situations. Think of them as inner family members, each with their own feelings, perspectives, and roles. For example:

A critical part that points out your mistakes.
A protective part that keeps you from getting too close to others.
A fun-loving part that just wants to enjoy life.
A worried part that tries to plan for every possible problem.

It can feel chaotic at times, but every part actually has a positive intention—it’s trying to help you, even if its strategy isn’t always helpful.

You Are Not Broken

One of the most comforting truths of IFS is this: having different parts doesn’t mean something is wrong with you. It means you’ve adapted. Our parts usually form in response to our life experiences. Maybe that critical voice helped you strive for safety or approval growing up. Maybe the part that avoids conflict protected you from pain.

When we look at parts this way, we can begin to soften toward them. Instead of thinking, “Why am I like this?” we can begin to ask, “What is this part trying to do for me?”

Meeting Your Parts with Curiosity

IFS invites us to shift from judgment to curiosity. The next time you notice an inner voice—whether it’s anxious, demanding, or even harsh—try pausing to ask:

What is this part worried about?
What is it hoping to protect me from?
How long has it been carrying this role?

You may be surprised at the wisdom that comes forward.

The Role of Self

Alongside all your parts, IFS believes there is also something deeper: your Self. Self is the calm, compassionate, centered core of who you are. When you connect with Self, you can listen to your parts without being overwhelmed by them. Think of it as being the caring parent your inner family has always needed.

A Gentle First Step

You don’t have to dive in all at once. A gentle first step is simply noticing when different parts of you show up throughout your day. “A part of me feels nervous about this meeting.” “Another part of me wants to say yes, but a part of me wants to say no.” Naming your parts helps you remember: you are more than any single thought, feeling, or behavior.

You’re not broken—you’re beautifully complex. And every part of you belongs.

OTHER COUNSELING SERVICES WE OFFER IN DENVER, CO

We offer a variety of additional services besides brain-spotting and EMDR therapy. WellMinded Counseling also offers the following therapy services:

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