In this powerful episode, we dive deep into the recurring theme of women feeling the need to change or abandon parts of themselves in order to “keep the peace” at work, in relationships, or with friends and family. So many of us find ourselves bending over backwards, shrinking, or silencing our needs to fit into spaces that aren’t aligned with who we are. But what happens when we stop acting from a place of misalignment and start honoring our true selves?
Key Takeaways:
The Strain of Misalignment: Many women feel pressured to abandon their boundaries and authenticity in order to fit in or be seen as successful or worthy. This constant pressure can lead to feelings of doubt, exhaustion, and a deep sense of betrayal toward oneself.
Challenge the Narrative: It’s time to reject the toxic message that we need to change to be accepted. When we stand firm in who we are and act in alignment with our values, the relationships or environments around us will either adapt or fall away—and that’s okay.
Real-Life Example: Stephanie shares a story of a woman who constantly feels like she has to work harder, ignore her emotions, and overfill her plate to be seen as “enough.” This cycle of striving ultimately leads to burnout and a sense of inadequacy.
Creating Space for Authenticity: True peace and safety come from environments where we can show up as our authentic selves. Whether it means leaving a toxic job, setting boundaries in relationships, or creating a healthier environment, we deserve spaces where we are valued and seen.
What’s Holding You Back?: Stephanie encourages listeners to evaluate their current spaces and relationships. If they aren’t aligned with your true self and values, it may be time to ask: “Is it worth staying?”.
The Journey to Ease: Transitioning from toxic environments to spaces of peace is not easy. It requires identifying what kind of environment feels safe, setting boundaries, and learning to rest. But in that journey, we find more peace, more ease, and a version of ourselves that thrives.
Reflection Questions:
Are there areas in your life where you feel like you have to abandon yourself to fit in?
What would it look like to act in alignment with your true self every day?
How can you create or seek spaces that honor your boundaries, authenticity, and emotional safety?
Stephanie’s message is a call to step away from the toxic hustle culture and the pressure to conform, and instead, to embrace ease, peace, and self-alignment. When we honor who we truly are, we not only transform our own lives but also positively impact those around us.
Join the Conversation: We’d love to hear from you! How are you acting in alignment with yourself? What shifts are you making to honor your boundaries and create peace? Share your thoughts and experiences with us on social media and let’s keep redefining what it means to live authentically.
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Figured I'd pop on and discuss something that has been happening. And a lot of relationships. Relationships are a huge part of every person's life. And oftentimes, in relationships, women can carry the emotional burden unevenly compared to other people in the relationships.
What I've seen a lot in my experience of working with people on their relationships is this sense of duty or pride, maybe, of avoiding guilt by always being present and available, letting people act in whatever way they want in order to stay in the relationship. Whether that's a romantic one, a parent-child relationship, a friendship, or a work relationship. Not to ignore other genders or orientations, either.
People might find themselves sacrificing who they are and abandoning themselves to maintain relationships and keep the peace. And I don't know, I'm just kind of tired of that happening, and people putting themselves on some sort of mission to stay in relationships that aren't productive for them.
I've seen this in parent-child relationships, where the child feels like they need to shut down a part of themselves to be in a relationship with their parents. They mask, minimize, or hide who they are in order to show up for family events like Thanksgiving or family vacations. And I don't know, I’m just feeling like if we can’t even be ourselves around our parents, who can we be ourselves around?
That fear that holds you back from showing up as yourself needs to be listened to, nurtured, and healed so you can show up in that dynamic as yourself. I've been finding more and more women coming into my office and talking about not being able to be themselves at work. They feel like they need to put on this busy performance hat where they are just productive, make no noise, and engage in a frantic feeling where they have to abandon themselves and act out of alignment with their morals or ethics.
A theme I've been noticing is that women in relationships—whether with their boss, parents, partners, or friends—are coming into sessions and exploring why they feel so exhausted, burnt out, frustrated, and depressed. It all comes back to this general theme of women feeling like they need to abandon themselves and act out of alignment with their character, morals, or ethics to get along or stay in relationships with people and organizations that may not deserve that.
Maybe they don't need to change who they are to fit into the greater organization or relationship. What would it be like to act in alignment with yourself even when the message is to change or be something different, especially when your morals, ethics, and personality characteristics are involved?
A theme that I've been noticing a lot in my work recently is women feeling they have to change or abandon themselves or act out of alignment with themselves to keep the peace, whether at work or in their relationships with partners, friends, or family. Somehow, they make themselves smaller or fit into a mold that doesn’t help their well-being. They bend over backwards, adjust their boundaries, and begin to doubt themselves because someone else is telling them to behave in a way that doesn’t align with who they are or their boundaries.
I say, forget that narrative. Show up in alignment with your moral