Stopping for Self-Care: How to Identify your Emotional Needs

We hear the phrases “self-love” and “self-care” a lot these days, and it often feels like we’re being told that slapping on a face mask can solve all of our problems. The truth is that self-love is an ongoing process! Much like a relationship with any other person, we each must take the time to get to know ourselves intimately and learn what habits can help us maintain our emotional health, confidence, and peace.

Here are five possible times a day that you can check-in and ask yourself if your mental health needs a little more attention.

First thing in the morning

Whether you simply wake up on the wrong side of the bed or are braced for a stressful day, a negative start to the day can impact your mental health incorporating self care into your morning routine is the perfect way to set the tone for the day. Some habits to try could include meditation, a gratitude journal, or positive affirmations.

Mealtimes

If you find yourself breezing through meals, it’s time for a check in––feeding your body is an act of love! Try turning off your screens and even doing some deep breathing exercises or light stretching before returning to your day’s activities.

Before you say yes

Before agreeing to plans with friends, taking on an additional project, or committing to help a family member over the weekend, take stock of both your schedule AND your mental health! Are you feeling drained and in need of extra rest or alone time this weekend? Do the proposed plans fall appropriately within your relationship boundaries?

When you unplug

When you get home from your work or school commute, or when you finally get to close your laptop after a long day of remote interactions, it can be too easy to turn straight to your phone, the TV, or another habitual activity. Instead, this is another great opportunity to consider a few minutes of meditation, your preferred form of exercise, a creative hobby, or chatting with a friend or family member for some laughs.

Before bed

Congratulations, you’ve now reached the face mask portion of this self-care post! Your nighttime routine is just as important as your morning routine, as these habits signal to your brain and your body that it’s time to wind down and rest. This is the perfect time for all of your favorite relaxation activities! Skin or hair care are Instagram’s go-to, but light reading and journaling about your day are excellent ways to relax, as well.

Here’s a pro tip: this is not the time to break out your planner and schedule your day tomorrow. Focus your attention inward; evaluate your experiences and your emotional responses of today before taking on what awaits tomorrow.

The biggest tip we can give you is to remind you that self-care is about YOU. Experiment with new habits and practices, and cut out the ones that just don’t work for you anymore. Lean in to what makes you feel your best and, when it works, embrace it.

Mental Health 101: A 2021 Forecast for Each Generation

After a year like 2020, we’re all feeling the pressure to go into 2021 with our best foot forward,

and prioritizing our mental health is an important step in that process. While everyone’s life and

needs are unique and require a personalized path to healing, recovery, fulfillment, or success,

our expertise has also shown us patterns in how each generation faces its personal challenges.

Keep reading as we overview the mental health challenges and opportunities that your

generation may meet this year and the practices you can consider to help make 2021 your best

year yet. Think of it as your mental health horoscope.

Gen X:

To those of us in Generation X, it can seem like the world is changing rapidly around us, maybe

even spinning out of our control. This year, it’s going to be important to approach all of your

relationships and endeavors with thoughtful communication. Introducing daily mindfulness

habits, like meditation, can be a great way to get ahead of those spiraling feelings and keep

your focus on what’s important: the people and activities you love.

Millennials:

Millennials are making big changes this year. Whether you’re getting that big promotion, starting

a family, or getting down on one knee, progress is in the air. This year, it’s time to finally put

some serious thought into getting back into counseling or starting counseling with your partner,

as well as work on building a support network who will have your back through the challenges

ahead.

Gen Z:

The first few members of Gen Z are transitioning into adulthood, while the majority of this

generation still finds themself in their teens, tackling high school, college, and all of the stress

that comes along with this future-planning. For this generation, establishing habits of self-love

and self-care, including learning to set and maintain boundaries, are more crucial than ever in

2021.

Like your Generation X counterparts, daily mindfulness practices like journaling and meditation

can help Generation Z stay on top of a challenging schedule or mitigate fluctuating emotions.

These habits can continue to provide release and mindfulness throughout your life, as they will

always grow with you!

Learn more about how WellMinded Counseling’s many different services can help you transform

your 2021 on our website, and follow us on social media for more quick tips and community to

supplement your mental health journey.

3 Ways to Keep Your Mental Health in Check During the Holidays

Stress, depression and anxiety can ruin the holidays - and sabotage your mental health. Met with an assortment of responsibilities from entertaining to gift-purchasing, it’s no surprise that many people struggle with increased emotional distress during the holidays. 

While you may feel these emotions even more this year due to COVID-19, your mental health comes first. Explore our top tips for keeping your mental health top of mind during the holidays:

1. Take control

It’s normal to say “yes” to every holiday invitation, potluck, gift-giving scenario and more. But you have a budget, time and sanity to keep in check. Rather than agreeing to every invitation: be pragmatic. Assess how much budget you want to allocate to the holiday season, including hostess gifts, gift-exchange parties and potluck dinners. Let’s face it: the expenses add it. Don’t feel guilty for saying no to spending too much money. Instead, think of creative ways to give back to various scenarios: provide homemade gifts, donate to a charity in someone’s name, or donate your time (vs. money) to an organization.

Aside from assessing a budget, plan ahead. Set aside specific days to shop, cook, or have personal time. Consider if online shopping or catering may be a feasible option for saving time and energy. Also consider COVID and the health of your family, of course it would be nice to get together, and I know virtual get together are getting exhausting, however there are some resources that have made it more feasible and more fun. Websites such as www.elfster.com allow you to do secret Santa and practice social distancing so you’re keeping your budget and social distancing into account.

2. Stick to healthy habits

While holidays may be the season of over-indulgence, stick to healthy habits that will always make you feel good, such as daily exercise, healthy meals, and plenty of sleep. Try a new healthy routine, such as meditation or journaling, to keep mental health in check. And while news channels and social media are avenues of information, be mindful that too much consumption can wreak havoc on your holiday perspective. After all, not everything in the world is doom and gloom. 

I’d suggest using resources like www.headspace.com as a tool to help you meditate and sleep, as mentioned earlier there needs to be to be time for some movement in your life and on Youtube there is a library of free workout classes, I personally recommend something like Yoga with Adriene www.youtube.com/user/yogawithadriene .

3.Make time for yourself

This is always challenging since the holiday season is filled with family and friends. And while we always love being with them, it’s important to take time out for yourself and have some alone time. Read a book, journal, exercise, go for a walk, listen to music. Whatever it is - do it alone, without distractions or excessive noise. 

This Holiday season will be feeling different since the time together might look different, AND it's still okay to take space for yourself. If you have emotional reactions that come up, don’t forget you can always reach out for support. Here at WellMinded we want to support you through this unprecedented time.

Here's Why It's Important to Set Boundaries

By Courtney Miller, LPC



Ever wonder what the importance of boundaries can have on your life? Whether it be  romantic relationships, friendships, relationships with co-workers, or relationships with family, boundaries are important in helping individuals locate more of their personal identity and belief, and allow others close to them to know these things.

One may also not understand the form of boundaries that needs to be focused on. Boundaries are not simply right out in front of everyone. Boundaries can be mental, emotional, physical, and even digital. By knowing this, one has an easier time what to recognize and how to handle. Are you able to  notice what upsets you? Does the effect begin mentally, emotionally, physically, or digitally? 

In order to identify your true boundaries, you need to take some time and focus on things such  as your limits. What makes you uncomfortable or stressed in romantic relationships, friendships,  relationships with co-workers, or family relationships? How much will you tolerate and why? What will  you accept? What makes it worth accepting?  

View each of these relationships separately. On a scale of 1-10, how strong of discomfort or resentment do you feel? If higher than 5, next time you meet with the person take a step  back and ask yourself why you feel this way. What are they doing, or their expectation that is bothering  you? When someone makes you uncomfortable, it may be a hint that someone is crossing a boundary. 

Now that you know what and who may be bothering you, you can take the next and possibly one of the most important steps. Calmly and clearly let the person know what is bothering you in  regards with the form of relationship and why. Make sure the person clearly understands what  boundaries are, is expected with them, and is up for them the equal amount as you. Openly discuss with  the person what each of you believes may help rebuild the situation, why, and how. Boundaries are a  sign of self-respect because you are standing up for your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs. Just remember,  that if someone is going to hear you out and work with you, you may need to do vice versa if needed.  Depending on the situation, it can make self-respect stronger. 

Once you are able to set the boundaries make sure everyone tries to stick with them. If you find  that you are falling back, ask yourself why and what else is involved. What do I have control over  right now? Do I still want the boundary, why? What can I do to reset it? If someone else crosses it, let  them know what about the situation bothered you, and what you can all do to continue to grow. For example, find something that may make it easier to remember.  

Most importantly, while working on the boundaries, focus on yourself. Are you feeling  differently? Are you feeling better or worse? What makes you happy and unhappy? See if any of these  have changed and how since the boundaries began. Remember, boundaries are to help you keep track  of who you are and can always be changed as needed.

Mindset Maintenance: What to Do During Uncertainty

Let’s face it: crisis and uncertainty are inevitable. It’s true the date for when the world will return to normal keeps getting pushed back, but it’s also true that this pandemic will end. 

Our digital landscape isn’t helping our mindsets as well as it could. The news is constantly sharing mixed content for what are the best precautions and recommendations for managing our day-to-day lives, and words such as “pandemic,” “quarantine” and “closures” are in our everyday vocabulary (along with a face mask becoming the most fashionable accessory of 2020). 

Aside from this, unemployment rates vary each month, schools open, close or change to virtual learning environments as often as the weather changes, and everyone across the country is feeling isolated, stressed and anxious. Working parents are forced to partake in multiple roles beyond capacity as an employee, parent and teacher, among other duties. 

How can we best protect our minds during this uncertain time? Your attitude really is everything. 

It’s critical to not let fear take over our minds - after all, fear is a more damaging virus to mankind. Instead, summon the courage to reinterpret fear as a calling to be stronger and serve the greater good. 

What are some ways to manage your thoughts?

Meditation.

While practicing meditation, you’re encouraged to focus on the present moment on purpose and without judgement. During this time, your mind is distracted from the thoughts that had caused you anxiety, stress or fear. Over time, regular meditation practitioners learn to appreciate the present moment versus focuses on the past. 

Unsure how to get started? Try shifting your energy. Begin by taking a deep breath and closing your eyes. And then, begin to notice things:

• How you’re feeling at this very moment

• Emotions and sensations you feel

• See if you know why you’re feeling these emotions or sensations

At this point, acknowledge the reason and let it go with a deep inhale and exhale. Reset with additional deep breaths. Keep noticing and maintaining attention on your sensations until you feel connected to a new state, and then open your eyes. 

In this uncertain time, it’s normal for anxiety and stress to increase each day. Return to a centered mindset with daily meditation.